cuz i feel as though im that small little girl, waiting for you to return into my life. i dont wanna lose you anymore. maybe you're more important than many other things in my life. i don't know. i got no idea. i just wish to see you. sighs

mummy was talking to me today, i could see the devastation in her. she never used to bring up ITE to me. but today she suddenly told me " if you really do that badly, don't force yourself, i know you aren't that good, if you really really tried already but you still cant make it to poly, go ITE." i really wanna cry. i just don't know what should i say, what should i do.

i used to have friends telling me their big dreams, telling me they wanna go to poly, i used to have friends saying " if we can go poly, lets go poly together." all these have been crushed. they are no more there. ACCEPT THE FACT! i'll be going to poly alone with 10,000 over students, i'll be facing strangers. WHERE WOULD BE THE FRIENDS THEN? but there's something that mummy said i could do if i never ever make it to poly. i can be a kindergarten teacher. [:

thats my biggest dream. to be a kindergarten teacher. i would love to teach kids. hees. maybe that's whats left for me.